Current:Home > reviewsSwiping on dating apps has turned into a career for some. Here's how they turned love into a job. -Excel Money Vision
Swiping on dating apps has turned into a career for some. Here's how they turned love into a job.
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Date:2025-04-18 01:29:53
More than 70% of Americans say a rewarding career or job is extremely important for them to live a fulfilling life — more important than family, friends or wealth. CBS News interviewed a broad array of workers who chose unique jobs, for a series we call: Unique jobs, extraordinary lives.
Andrew Boese, a 38-year-old Arizona-based music enthusiast, isn't a fan of travel. But online and for work, he might find himself impersonating an older Australian gentleman with wanderlust looking for love. He's adopted several other different personas too, including a professional ice hockey player, advertising executive and 22-year-old heir to a family business fortune.
For the past decade, he has been a ghostwriter for Vida Select, a global company with 135 employees that does the legwork of online dating — including creating a profile, swiping and messaging with prospective dates — for people seeking new relationships.
It's an emotionally fulfilling career and one that satisfies his creative instincts, Boese said.
"It gives you a chance to live vicariously through your clients. You may be terrified of heights, but typing the words 'I love bungee jumping' could be cathartic," he said. "It's a chance to try on new shoes and see myself in another life."
Boese, who landed at Vida Select by answering a classified ad for a creative writer, takes pleasure in making love matches for others and enjoys the flexibility the job affords. He typically sets his own hours and works remotely.
Boese spends hours every day logged into dating apps, on behalf of a handful of the company's 387 clients, inhabiting their communication styles and dating preferences, even if they're a different gender or generation, or have interests vastly different from his own.
He is single himself — but logs on to dating apps strictly for work. "It's like a car mechanic that drives a broken-down pickup truck. You don't take your work home with you, I guess. There are other ways to meet people and I enjoy those," he said.
Clients either don't have time or aren't skilled at navigating online dating so they hire Vida Select, whose employees — including Boese — say they've found a uniquely satisfying career path.
Outsourcing dating lives
The company was founded by owner Scott Valdez after he sent 47 messages to eligible prospects on dating apps without receiving a single reply. He told CBS News people outsourced many things in their lives such as dog walking or scheduling appointments so he thought – "why not online dating?"
He placed a job ad on Craigslist where he met a writer who Valdez, 39, said had "a knack for online dating."
"He took my approach and improved upon what I was doing," said Valdez, who ultimately ended up in a committed relationship.
Now there are over 100 employees at Vida Select, a multi-million dollar company. Matchmakers manage a client's account, and scouts choices by swiping left and right on candidates. Valdez said Vida Select does not publicly disclose its exact revenue. Employees are compensated on an hourly basis, but Valdez did not disclose their pay rates. "Given our global reach, hourly rates are thoughtfully adjusted according to each team member's experience and the cost of living in their respective locations," Valdez said.
Boese, the ghostwriter, said that while he doesn't make millions, having a viable career that gives him autonomy over when and where he works is worth the tradeoff. Being his own boss helps him relate to the higher-paid business tycoons he sometimes writes for, he added.
The matchmaking industry is estimated to be worth $1.2 to $1.5 billion globally, with nearly 40% of the market located in the United States, according to an estimate from Marketdata. Pricing is somewhat opaque, but high-end matchmakers can charge clients tens of thousands — or even hundreds of thousands — of dollars a year, with no guarantee of a happy ending.
Over five years, Cam Smith, who manages the company's team of 36 ghostwriters, has become adept at adopting any given client's particular tone and style, whether it be assertive and confident, or passive and empathetic, for example.
When Smith is "online dating" for someone whose personality is very different from their own, they use a particular technique. "I find a point of comparison in my life, whether it's a friend, family member, or character on a show that has a similar archetype of personality. I'm implanting that in my mind as my anchor point," they said.
Ultimately, the Vida Select team's job is to distill clients' core values and desires, and create sparks online that could ultimately lead to a satisfying offline relationship or even marriage.
"It's about being able to embody who they would be if they had all the time and energy to put into it," Smith said.
"I know what they're looking for"
Ghostwriters like Boese, a former record producer and night club manager, fill out clients' bios and write messages to prospects in the voice and style of a given individual. Boese says he spends up to four hours daily managing a single client's different dating profiles on apps including Tinder, Bumble, Hinge and more.
In college, Boese dabbled in script writing and found that creating characters and writing their dialogue came naturally to him.
"I use the same skillset working for Vida Select, except I don't have to create the characters. They're real people, and when we conduct interviews with new clients, I get every ounce of information out of them I could possibly need to come off as them," he said.
He still produces records as a hobby but found that doing so to pay the bills sucked the joy out of what remains a passion.
While Boese writes for clients of all ages, genders and backgrounds, he's found a sweet spot in writing for divorced men in their 40s and 50s who are looking for love again.
"I still enjoy writing for all types — it's fun — whether it's men or women. It's a challenge and I look forward to that," he said. What's perhaps most satisfying for Boese, he said, is that if he does his job right, all a client has to do is "be themselves." It's a fantastic feeling he said.
"The thrill that comes from knowing that one of our clients has gone on to live their happily ever after is unlike anything I've had the opportunity to experience in any other writing role I've held in my life."
And judging a prospect's physical attractiveness from someone else's point of view isn't as awkward as it might seem. "I have a list of client preferences and I know what they're looking for, so I'm not putting my likes into it at all," Boese said.
When the topic of travel comes up, he has to reconcile his desire to stay put with a client's eagerness to roam.
"Almost every client we have loves to travel and right off the bat I'm matching with people whose first question is, 'Where do you want to go?'" he said. "I answer as truthfully as I can from the client's point of view."
For Smith, the ultimate reward lies in making a match that lasts. "The thrill that comes from knowing that one of our clients has gone on to live their happily ever after is unlike anything I've had the opportunity to experience in any other writing role I've held in my life," they said.
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Megan Cerullo is a New York-based reporter for CBS MoneyWatch covering small business, workplace, health care, consumer spending and personal finance topics. She regularly appears on CBS News Streaming to discuss her reporting.
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